The Quick Kiss Good Day

Shuttled back into the badly-built mold box bedroom with my brother needing the lounge room floor, I found 3 hours of battered sleep as I remembered how badly these windows block sound - especially construction. As the big build nearby angle-grinds its way to completion, another was just demolished. I tried to convince myself the sounds could be part of dreams.
I woke with oedema eyes. You know - when someone has a visible allergic reaction, and the skin around their eyes is puffed with lymph fluid? I heard a click of the front door, and my brother quietly left the house.
I jumped out of bed, trotted out and and stuck a bleary, puffy, unslept face out into the hall.
"You going?"
"Yeah."
"Good bye. Good bye. Good bye. Good bye."
He toddled over and kissed me on the top of the head.
Okay, so he's not totally terrible after all.

Don't Sway My Way

That moment when a crazy/mentally disabled/drunk man staggers to a stop when he sees you, and sways while he debates whether to make an unwanted, semen-loaded cameo in your day simply because you are appealingly female and he is ready to mate now, please, but does a final side-to-side and meanders away, to your utter, and repetitive relief.

Supermarket Beating

What a weird day. Lightning strikes at a south-eastern sky, and a series of PT delays and misses saw me outside a supermarket witnessing a gym-bulked guy beating the shit out of a skinny black dude. I videoe'd it and have to email it to the cops.

 

Funnily, Google Maps asked if I want to add the video to the business's Google page :)

 

Not so funnily was how sick I felt afterwards as the adrenaline wore off, but hard to determine when you already have nausea from tonsillitis. I know I don't feel right after witnessing that. The staff interfered, one brutalised the victim with blows to the head (he still works there - I return his smiles with ice-carved eyes), but none came out to talk to the police. They stood inside. Not just that, one escorted the attacker out the back door while the victim staggered out the front. He was done for shoplifting, but his attackers were there buying Jim Beam.

 

It's sad how often I see this imbalance, this insanity. Even the cops didn't go after the guy who kneed him and kicked him - even after seeing my video. They handcuffed the droopy black guy. 

On the bench beside him - two Crunchies and a tin of meat.

Phoned-In Obsession

They say that in adulthood, you are well-served to look back at the things that you loved as a child. Your favourite book will tell you a lot about yourself - that one you carted around everywhere and insisted everyone read to you until it looked shaggier than a mange dog. We are still that person in a lot of ways.

I was just remembering my love of phones. I always wanted a phone. I was obsessed with how American girls on sitcoms got phones in their bedrooms. Hamburger and lip phones were coveted. I would get an old rotary phone and take it to school - not just primary but high school (different phones). I would be out at dinner with my parents and be pretending to take a call from my agent on my flip-cell in 1994. Once in high school my mum took my fake flip off me and started having phonesex with the guy I was 'talking to'. To this day you can bet your ass I would take a corded phone out in public just to confuse people. 

 

What is it with me and phones? I used to be allured by walkie-talkies and CBs too, which felt like secret worlds. Like electronic psychic power. Broadcasting, long before such a thing was ever handed off to us in the form of the internet.

The Have-Nots

I used to see no-one else
Out in the world
With him
My eyes pointed one direction
One solely
Limbs wrapped around him like a fur stole
A cat always making contact
Doting and laughing and holding what little I could
What wasn't tensed
Walking too fast
Keeping a distance
Turning away.
Now all I see is everyone else
Happy coupled
Hands pegged together
A ricochet of smiles
Shoulders rubbed
A tug closer
That's if I notice anyone else at all any more.
I don't seek out eyes
I have nothing to say
So little to offer
An attractive young thing claps eyes on mine
And the look is held
Too long to be casual
In another life I may have been interested
Turned open eyes to open mouths
Blushed in the flattery
But I stare at him like a ghost
A female remnant haunting the streets
Slowly, casually, coolly hurtling towards nothing
Until I'm ready to stare back at someone
Some very faraway day
When I can feel the sun again
Something more than this neverending cold.

A Visit

I dreamed of him
In shadow hours
Light of my life
Holding
Staying
Pulling me to him
No more war or wanting
Just home
Safe home
And I woke too quickly
Coughing
Searched for water
Fever sweating
Closed my eyes to nothing

He was gone.

Guarding Lions

Kings that sit at the head of driveways.
Waiting for what?
Sniffing the nothing.
The world darkening and nearing sleep for us.
But for them, a day begins, and the night is their playground.